


Back to Square One.

by KohiPlease



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Crushes, Drama, F/M, Falling In Love, Ficlet Collection, First Dates, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Misunderstandings, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-10-24 21:44:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17712146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KohiPlease/pseuds/KohiPlease
Summary: In all his experiences of manifestations, he'd been certain of one thing: his feelings for you, the girl who no longer had any memory of him.A second chance at life gives him reason to retrace his past mistakes and make things right. An adventure of unfathomable events awaits.The big question: why does a heart love when it knows that with it comes pain?And you are the encyclopedia his new heart wishes to explore.( Roxas ❣ Reader )WARNING: this series contains spoilers for kingdom hearts 3, so tread carefully.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> WASSUP Y'ALL, kingdom hearts 3 has shred my heart into p i e c e s, and so i felt this strong desire to start a mini-series. sorry if it's all over the place, bwahaha, i don't exactly have much of a plan in terms of where this is going to go. hence why i'll keep each chappy short and sweet. buuuut, hopefully it helps bring a lil' joy into all your hearts! ♥
> 
> thanks for your patience with me! i am (very slowly) updating other series too, bear with me pleaaaase!

**01 ♥ "how _you_ doin'?"**

Pixels really _couldn’t_ do your real radiance justice.

Upon being freed from the digitalized world he once called home, Roxas'd been worried that you were **just** a manifestation of that world. That you were just a carefully constructed sprite designed specifically to (successfully) give Roxas incentive to remain in the data world he once called home.

Everyone memory tinged with the presence of you remained as vividly as they were when they were initially engraved in his heart. 

They were memories of the times he’d visit the store you worked at for more than just ice-cream. It always came with the bonus of your welcoming smile, the honey-dipped greeting, and the added bonus of hearing his name on your lips as you bid him farewell. He didn’t need validation from a popsicle stick to know that he really _was_ a “winner”.

He could never really pinpoint the reason as to why he’d been so drawn to you. Was it because of the fact that you radiated nothing but positivity? Your smile was refreshing, your very presence uplifting. The rare moments you’d playfully punch his arm kept his mind preoccupied for the rest of the day. Your touch lingered on his skin like the warmth of the sun peeking through the clouds on wintry days. 

You triggered in him sensations foreign to his inexperienced heart. The majority of them were pleasant.

And only one, unfortunately, that was _excruciating_ : **pain** , triggered by loss.

Triggered by losing you.

It’d been around the same time he’d begun to grow suspicious of his role in the data world. When he’d bolted over to where you worked, desperate to search for the light in his darkening world, he’d been met with a version of you he never fathomed he would ever witness. You sat peacefully on the counter of the store, caressed by the rays of the sun, but the view of your visage was clear.

The face he loved dripped with anguish, every trace of warmth stripped, even from the way you’d gazed at him.

And just when he’d reached out for you, desperate to solve the mystery surrounding your foreign vibe, you had dispersed into the wind as dust would, bidding your farewell with a single, bittersweet sentence.

_“I’m sorry.”_

_For what_ , he wished he could ask. He really wished he could.

Perhaps it’d been best that you were solely meant for that world. It pained him to even think of accepting that fact, but he had to be mindful of what was _best_ and not what would be _ideal_.

You seemed too perfect to be real. Too perfectly ideal for him.

And yet you did exist. He could almost hear his newly inherited heart sing when his eyes caught sight of your familiar face at the exact same place he’d first encountered you.

This infatuation he felt, now paired with a pure, light-filled heart, was far more intense than he’d ever experienced before. His chest felt warmer, and the temperature in his cheeks seemed to rise with just the sheer thought of you. 

He wouldn’t make the same mistake as he had before. No giving into the nervousness. No torturing himself over possible embarrassing outcomes of him losing the ability to speak in your presence or tripping on some pebble or whatever.

Those choices prevented him from seeing any sign of distress in you before. He wasn’t going to experience that pain again.

He couldn’t _bear_ to go through that nightmare.

He’d make his feelings evident this time. A new Roxas had been reborn. He’d been given a second chance to live. A second chance to make things right with you.

And he was sure as heck going to live every moment while making sure you did too.

…Except, there was one tiny, itty bitty issue he'd seemed to have forgotten about.

“Oh, a new face!” Roxas could only gape in disbelief at the comment that left your lips, arms having been extended out to receive the plastic bag holding his favourite sea-salt ice-cream from you now left frozen in air.

Ugh. Of course. The you of this Twilight Town had no clue who the heck he was.

He scrutinized you to the point of discomfort: there’d been an almost _sad_ look in his eyes, one you couldn’t figure out a reason behind. The few seconds that passed felt like ages, ending only when you cleared his throat. It had (finally) brought Roxas back from his trip to la la land.

“Well, hope to see you around, sir!” You hadn't even spared a second glance before pivoting on your heel, humming cluelessly as you disappeared to the storage room at the back of the store.

" _Sir_ …?" He murmured, still in disbelief that the days he'd spent building courage had been spent on a moment that lasted under thirty seconds. As he’d walked down the hills of Twilight Town’s central district, he’d slid his palm down his face. Roxas heaved a large sigh in disappointment at his failure to act normal.

The blond nearly toppled to the side when a larger arm snaked to squeeze his body to the side of another. The bright red tresses gave away the identity immediately.

“It was the girl you like, huh?” Axel mused, allowing Roxas to swallow the words that formerly threatened to leave his parted lips. Axel couldn’t control the laugh that bellowed from his core, causing Roxas’ visage to inherit a shade of red that could rival the radiance of Axel’s hair. “Oh c’mon, I noticed it in _that_ world, you aren’t exactly better at keeping it hidden here— _ow_!”

Roxas pinched the taller male’s side, having released himself from Axel’s grip in order to gain some distance from him. He’d averted his gaze in embarrassment. “It isn’t like that.”

“Oh, I _know_ it is.”

“Yes, _okay_ , it **is** , it isn’t a big deal!” Roxas was as surprised as Axel for the aggressive retort. The regret on his expression was enough to indicate an intention to apologize. “I just… I don’t remember it being this hard. Maybe it’s better this way. She’s… _pretty_ , I guess it’s normal to wanna look a little longer at a prettier face. This feeling’ll pass, so I just have to wait it out.”

Axel pursed his lips. “ **Lying** to yourself isn’t going to make it any better, y’know.” A pause followed. Axel released a low sigh and allowed his fingers to ruffle the shorter male’s blond locks. Earlier’s playfulness washed off, only to be inherited by something more serious. “You felt a kind of pain I can’t imagine feeling. Yet you got in there and gave it another shot. That kinda resolve—I’m no expert in the feelings department, but _if you ask me_ , I don’t think anyone’d put in that kinda effort for someone they’re just gonna wait to ‘unlike’.”

…He was right. Roxas’ silence was enough to indicate admitting to what Axel declared. His gaze lowered to the tips of his shoes, pace slowing to a stop with Axel’s halting soon after. Roxas brought his hand to his chest. _Thump, thump, thump_. With the mere thought of you, its speed quickened.

“Why does she make me feel this way…?” It’d been a genuine question, leaving Roxas’ lips in a soft murmur.

“Maybe…it’s your heart’s way of telling you it wants to give back to her.” Axel attempts to explain, rubbing at the nape of his neck. “All you saw was the good in her. Your heart already accepted that. Liked what it saw. But your heart likes a _human_ , and humans aren’t a hundred percent perfect-o. Liking someone, liking her, means your heart wants to get t’know her flaws—so it can figure out how it can help those areas. And maybe it wants her to see all the good in _you_ —you’re a catch yourself, y’know.” Contagious it was, Axel’s smile, because it triggered the sides of Roxas’ mouth to quiver upwards. “Hearts choose which imperfections they can learn to love, and I guess yours…chose hers.”

“You sound like a grandpa.”

“ _You little_ …—“

It felt good to laugh. Especially with Axel. He really had a way with words. Roxas’ gaze drifted up to the sun.

“Heh. Feelings really are complicated, huh?” Roxas let out a hearty chuckle, causing Axel to ruffle his head of hair once more. All the seriousness in the air dispersed when Axel had pulled out a folded flyer from his pocket.

“That’s why, my friend, your **best bud’s** gonna give you the first push towards your answers!” Roxas’ eyes scrutinize the print on the paper held so closely to his face. It seemed like a job ad for a temporary, one-day position as a cashier at…

_Oh_ …

Axel’s pearly whites peeked through the grin pasted on his face. “One whole day _behind_ that counter and next to _her_. “Hayner’s come up with a spontaneous trip idea, money’s tight, we all gotta contribute, so this is your chance to win both ways. Got it memorized?”

The uncertainty in his core melted into the same warmth he felt just earlier upon seeing you. 

Guess it was time to start from scratch. He couldn’t just data transfer every precious moment he shared with you into your brain. This was a start. _The_ start.

He only had about a bajillion hours of catching up to do.

At least he was adamant on trying. And it was going to be one confusing rollercoaster ride. Pretty great at times. Terrifying at others. But worth it all the while.

He didn't want to give you up.

Not when you'd taught him never to give up on himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think this series is getting longer and longer by the chapter aka my previous plans of keeping it short and sweet are likely to change. (〃￣ω￣〃ゞ
> 
> ANYWHO, i hope it turns out nice regardless! enjoy, my baes, reviews are aaaaalways appreciated! ♥♥

**02 ♥ "got a name?"**

When he’d rushed to respond to the ad Axel had so generously introduced him to, Roxas anticipated getting the chance to work _alongside_ you. 

It didn’t really cross his mind that he’d actually be filling in _for_ you. 

Roxas heaved a heavy sigh and adjusted the cap on his head, the other hand smoothening the creases on his brightly dyed uniform. His gaze scrutinized the view ahead of him, drinking in the peace that stretched across the town’s streets. Yet his heart remained unsettled and disappointed. He’d finally crossed over this damn countertop that kept you both apart, but instead, it resulted in a switch of roles rather than an opportunity of his dreams. Roxas inhaled sharply and exhaled slowly. There was nothing he could do. He had to think positively. Yes, his _personal_ reward would not be fulfilled, but at least this’d score him the money he needed for that trip Hayner planned. 

…He wondered if that’d been your reason for a day off today. The summer vacation was drawing close to its end, and for someone who worked almost every day, you were probably long overdue for a good relaxation session, right? 

He wondered what kind of crowd you hung out with in this world. More specifically, he was curious about the lucky bunch that got to get deeper into a conversation with you than the usual “ _See you again!_ ” he’d receive. 

It made him a little… **jealous**. 

Roxas shook his head vigorously and lightly slapped his cheeks—he’d been slacking on the job, and it hadn’t even been the first hour in yet. The owner left this duty to him, and he needed to focus on fulfilling what was expected of him. Tightening the strap of his cap, Roxas tended to the crowd that lined at the storefront. It’d only be five measly hours. How hard could this be? 

Answer: _very_. 

It’d only been when he’d dragged the shutters down that Roxas realized that the moon had already taken over the sky. With an exasperated sigh, he secured the shutters, finally blocking the view of the town he’d grown to slowly hate as his shift progressed. He had to take a moment to catch his breath, one hand flinging the cap from his head while the other undid the top two buttons of his uniform’s shirt. It was seriously a mystery how you managed to do this every single day without having ever broken down on the job. His jaw actually hurt with all the smiling he’d been instructed to do. Blue eyes drifted across all the boxes he’d yet to put away, but he didn’t mind this part at all. He drank in the blissful moment, one filled with sweet, sweet _silence_. 

His hands clutched at the bottom of a box on the floor. He pivoted and begun heading to the storage room, but his balance had been disturbed by one smooth cup he’d dropped earlier in his shift. While he prepared himself for the mess that was to follow his eventual fall, an opposing force interrupted the event. The tips of warm digits grazed the tips of his own, and when he’d tilted his head to identify his savior, he could feel his breath hitch in his throat upon meeting a pair of familiar eyes. 

And all of a sudden, today’s adventures were worth all the mental and physical exhaustion he endured. The sight of you was more refreshing than a gust of cold air on a hot summer’s day. 

“You look like you’ve gone through **war** , sea-salt boy.” You mused, offering him a pearly white grin in an attempt to lift his spirits. His only response was a weak chuckle, not because he’d been tired, but because he’d literally lost the ability to communicate. Instead, his gaze drank the attire that hugged your body; it seemed so foreign to see you in something other than your uniform. He almost forgot that, before anything else, you were a normal human being. A beautiful one at that. Your choice of clothing seemed too fancy to be for a casual hangout. A pang of envy erupted in his heart. He hated to think that this’d been for a…— 

“My _date_ had the same look in his eyes.” The comment was enough to change the expression on Roxas’ face, but it quickly melted into one of embarrassment when a boisterous laugh escaped your lips. “Relax, I’m **kidding**!” You paused for a brief moment. “I just thought it’d help get a word out of you. Ease the tension. You… _can_ talk, right?” 

“Yeah, sorry, I’m just…” Roxas’ outburst tapered into a murmur. He just felt compelled to respond in order to clarify any misunderstandings, but the exhaustion slapped him almost immediately. “…running on a percent of energy. Thanks for saving me before things got worse.” 

“Nah, I think that’s _my_ line. This kinda job’s rough, and you had to go through it alone. I’m so sorry.” The weight of the box had been lifted from the blond’s grip. He realized that you’d burdened yourself with what was supposed to be his task. 

“Wait, no, I had it, honest.” He argued, following your trail towards the back. “I made a promise to the owner. I’ve gotta stay loyal to it.” Despite his attempts to steal the boxes from your grip, you’d been quick to avert his actions. You pressed your toes to the floor and lifted your heels off the ground, successfully sliding the box into its rightful place on the top of the shelf before pivoting to meet the other’s gaze. 

“Uncle asked you to hold down the fort ‘till 11. And as you can see—” You’d lifted your watch and pointed at the time. “You’ve already done 2 minutes of _overtime_. Congratulations, sea-salt boy, you’re free. Now, let me take care of this, and you hold on to _that_ instead.” Roxas turned to the direction you’d nodded towards. His gaze landed on the pale green origami swan that sat at the center of a desk, standing out among a mess of strewn paperwork. His fingers grazed over the delicate masterpiece, noticing that something peeked from the crevice at its center. Bills of money. More specifically, one _too many_ bills he’d initially been promised. He could just hear Hayner screaming for joy. It brought a smile to his own face. It was nice knowing he’d contributed to the happiness of people that mattered. 

“That’s uncle’s delivery to you. He told me that you and your friends had a little something planned, so he figured he’d give you all a gift on top of what you’ve earned. And this—” A cold wrapper pressed at his cheeks, leaving a lingering tingle on his skin as he scrutinized the source. Your arm had extended out a sea-salt ice-cream bar in offer, the other hand gripping one of your own. “—is a bonus from me. Join me on the roof?” 

Wait, **what**?  
 _Was this seriously happening_  
Did today’s nightmarish shift mess with his auditory center?

“Um, I mean, it’s cool if you can’t. It _is_ late so…” Roxas blinked several times, regretting how idiotic he must’ve appeared just gaping at you, but quickly making up for the moment by taking the treat from your grasp. 

“No, I—I’d like that.” 

There’d been something magical in the air that night. Roxas was sure of it. Because how in the hell had he gotten this far into a conversation with you, to the point that you had _voluntarily_ invited him to spend time with you? Sitting on this rooftop, eating his favorite ice-cream, and being under the same night sky as you: even his wildest dreams couldn’t manifest a moment as euphoric as this. His tension gradually eased due to the warmth that ebbed from your aura. You were so incredibly easy-going. You’d started a conversation almost immediately upon getting to the rooftop, going on and on about anything and everything, with him listening and responding occasionally. He’d hate for you to feel as if you’d been saying too much; in fact, he didn’t want you to _stop_. 

“Enough about _me_.” You declared, the stick of a finished ice-cream hanging loosely from your mouth. “What’s sea-salt boy’s story, huh? Why decide to settle here, out of any other world out there?” 

Roxas let out a hearty chuckle. This question was bound to pop up. He leaned forward, elbows rested upon knees and fingers laced together. “It’s…complicated.” How could he explain the rollercoaster ride of an adventure he’d endured? He didn’t want to drag you into the troubles of his journey. You were too precious. With you, he’d start on a clean slate, hopefully embarking on a journey less intense than the ones he’d already experienced. 

You pursed your lips and tilted your head back. “ _Man_ , **all** you outsiders have a similar response.” Your gaze, previously glued to the stars above, shifted to settle on the side of his face. “Probably too soon to ask, anyway. But at least one mystery sea-salt boy can solve is…what his _name_ is?” Roxas’ eyebrows lifted in surprise. 

Oh yeah. You two’d never formally introduced one another. 

“Call me [Name]. No nickname, sadly, ‘cause my uncle was never creative enough to make one up for me.” 

Roxas smiled. “Roxas. No nickname, ‘cause even a nickname for my complicated name won’t make things simpler.” 

The laugh that left your lips had been the copy of one his ears witnessed before. It was nostalgic. He watched as you extended an arm towards the sky, drawing imaginary lines towards each of the stars with your index finger. “ _Roxas_ , huh… I wonder which one of those worlds was once your home…” 

Roxas buried his hands under his lap. “Have you ever been to any of them? Another world, I mean?” 

A trace of melancholy crept onto your expression, triggering concern in Roxas’ heart. You sighed softly and leaned back until your back pressed onto the roof’s tiles. “I’ve always dreamt of it. Wish I could one day, but I don’t know if that’ll ever be possible.” 

Roxas quirked a brow. “Huh? Why not?” 

The melancholy intensified, changing your usual chirpy expression into something much more mellow than Roxas had ever witnessed. Your lips pressed into a sad smile, lids descending to a close as you heaved a soft sigh. 

“My family’s out there somewhere. Searching for me. If they finally make it here the same time I leave, then what…” Your voice trailed off into silence, and you’d stopped yourself from continuing any further. What on _earth_ had gotten over you? You sprung up until your back straightened, earlier’s bitterness erased by your usual radiance once again as you cleared your throat and forced yourself to meet Roxas’ gaze. “I, uh, think it’s time we both retire for the night. I’m kinda spouting nonsense.” You slapped your hands together in apology. “I’m sorry Roxas, but could I ask you to forgot about the last thing I said? Just…please, do it for me. Please?” 

Although he had nodded, it would be easier said than done. The mystery of your final sentence echoed in his mind over and over again, driving his heart wild at the thought of seeing you in pain. What bothered him was that he hadn’t gotten the full story behind _what_ caused such an expression to make its debut on your features. 

How could he just disregard something that made the girl he loved **sad**? 

His pace matched your own as you two trekked down a steep road. “I’m glad for today.” Roxas commented, breaking the silence that fell between you two. Even he’d been surprised by the sudden confidence that overtook his system. “I got to know you better.” The sweetness in his words made the corners of your lips quiver northwards, a delightful hum leaving you. 

“You stole the words from me.” You rubbed at the nape of your neck. “To be honest, I was…kinda waiting until you said something to me. I have been for a while now actually. For more than just you asking for the usual at the store.” 

Roxas could literally feel his heart bash against his rib cage. “Really?” 

“Yeah.” You bashfully admitted. “I mean, I should’ve taken the initiative, but I guess… I was _nervous_? I tend to have strong impressions right from the starts, and I didn’t really wanna scare you off. So I was pretty happy when I realized that my replacement for today was you. My little wish came true.” 

He wished he could record those words and play them on repeat forever. The darkness of the night concealed the crimson that tinged his cheeks. You _wanted_ to get to know him? It seemed unfathomable to be the case. He scratched at his cheek and averted his gaze to his shoes. “So when I see you at the store tomorrow, I’ll say hi to you as a…” 

“A **friend**?” You completed his sentence. There was hope in your tone, one he confirmed with his smile and a very confident nod. 

“Yeah. A friend.” 

“Well, _friend_ , guess I’ll see you tomorrow. ‘Cause this is my stop.” You halted in front of the gateway leading to a small house. Cute, just like the girl that resided in it. “Thanks for today, Roxas. I mean it. And I’m talking about more than just covering for me.” 

Roxas let out a light chuckle. “Don’t be. It was a learning opportunity for me. Moreso to be even nicer to everyone working the same type job as you.” You rolled your eyes playfully, your laugh dancing in the quiet night air, pivoting and pushing the gates open. 

“Oh, and have fun tomorrow. You and your friends are going to the beach right?” Dang. He’d actually forgotten about that. You sighed dreamily at the thought of those golden sands, the clear water, and the overall perfection of that place. “It’s the best time to go. You deserve it after what you’ve been through today.” Something whirred in Roxas’ mind; now that you were his _friend_ , he could invite you along, right? Maybe it’d help lift your spirits. He didn’t know what you were battling, but at least he could do something to help contribute towards your betterment. Plus, the thought of seeing more of you elevated his heart rate again. With every step you took towards the door to your house, he mustered the courage to attempt to ask the big question. 

“Wait, [Name]— ” His voice was loud enough to catch your attention. Just when you’d turned your head and raised your brows, indicating that you’d given him your full attention again, the nervousness paralyzed Roxas’ body once again and rendered him speechless. 

And, much to his disappointment, nothing he _wanted_ to say managed to escape his lips. “…Goodnight.” He managed to muster, feeling regret coursing through his veins, incurable even by the smile you flashed him. 

“Goodnight, sea-salt boy.”


End file.
